top of page

Searching for Answers by Morgan Alexander



“Congratulations!” they said, as they placed my brand-new baby into my arms. “How

hard can this be?” I thought to myself… And if you are a mom, you might have an idea

of where I am going with this. My son, John Daniel, was born in January of this year

(2024). As I’ve been figuring this whole “mom” thing out, I have found myself striving,

struggling, and frustrated… really more than I’d like to admit. Sure, there have been

plenty of moments of absolute bliss, and I am so blessed to have my beautiful family! I

was prepared for motherhood to be challenging. But I found myself wondering, “Is it

really supposed to be this hard?”


I started searching for answers. I was desperate. People have been parenting long

enough now that there must be some sort of guide out there telling me what to do!

Quickly this turned into information overload. It seemed everywhere I looked I was being

told how to parent, how to be a better wife, how to be a better me. What I should do,

how I should do it, and when I should do it. Don’t do this. Do it this way instead.

Watching people on Instagram, watching friends raising their kids, reading blog after

blog and even a few parenting books… all in an attempt to “help” me do my best.

But I kept feeling MORE frustrated. Why did it work for them and not for me? Was I just

not good enough? I was angry at my husband for not doing things the way the books

said (when he hadn’t even read them…). I was angry at my baby for waking up in the

middle of the night AGAIN. I was so jealous of my friends whose babies were “sleeping

through the night” and “keeping perfect schedules”. I was comparing myself to everyone

else, trying to follow everyone’s advice, and I kept failing. Things seemed even harder

now than before I went down the rabbit hole of searching for answers and advice. I must

just not be a good enough mom.


As tears ran down my face one evening while I tried to nurse my screaming, tired,

hungry baby, I desperately cried out to God, “Please help me.” (I could blame

postpartum hormones or sleep deprivation that it took me so long to do this… but really

it was just pride). I was finally at the end of my own strength. I know better than this. I’ve

been following Jesus since I was 15, and God has taken me to this place more than

once. But once again, here I was, comparing myself to everyone else, and trying in all

my strength to figure things out and measure up. I was trying to be good enough. Again.

And once again, God was there to help. He had been there the whole time, just waiting

for me to come to Him. God in his grace and mercy prompted my husband to remind me

that what works for some people might not be what works for our family. That woke me

Up.


With my tired eyes I flipped my bible open with the Holy Spirit’s prompting to Psalm 24

NIV, and I read these verses:


“ 1  The earth is the Lord’s, and everything in it,

    the world, and all who live in it;

2  for he founded it on the seas

    and established it on the waters.

3  Who may ascend the mountain of the Lord?

    Who may stand in his holy place?

4  The one who has clean hands and a pure heart,

    who does not trust in an idol

    or swear by a false god.”


Immediately I knew and felt the conviction of the Holy Spirit that I was trusting in the idol

of information, and the advice of others had become my false god. I was listening to

everyone else’s voice, except for God’s.


Don’t get me wrong, advice and information can be so helpful in the right context. My

problem was that I was seeking those things first rather than listening to God’s voice

and seeking His guidance in this season of my life.


God used Psalm 24:1 NIV (“The earth is the Lord’s, and everything in it, the world, and

all who live in it…”) to remind me that He is in control. He knows what I need, what my

baby needs, and He will guide me in it. The world is filled with people offering their

advice with the best intentions, but my God, the creator of the universe, the one who

knit us together in our mothers’ wombs, is the only one who truly knows what is best for

us. Because of this, I will seek Him first, His will, His word, and He will take care of me.

He promises us this in Matthew 6:33 NIV, “But seek first His kingdom and His

righteousness, and all these things will be given to you as well.”


So, do I have motherhood all figured out now? Absolutely not! And things are still hard

sometimes. But I have peace again. I have joy again. I am not trying to measure up to

anything or anyone other than what God is calling me to. I have confidence that God in

His goodness and mercy will lead me through the seasons of my life to bring Him glory

and honor, and He will take care of me.


Whatever your season of life is right now, my hope is that you would be reminded to

seek God before seeking information and advice from anywhere else. He is the only

one who truly knows what we need. He alone can give us peace.


I will leave you with a prayer from Psalm 24. As you draw near to God, He will draw

near to you.


“ 1  The earth is the Lord’s, and everything in it,

    the world, and all who live in it;


Father, my life is yours. Everything I have, I surrender to you all over again.


2  for he founded it on the seas

    and established it on the waters.


You are our creator, and because of that, you know what is best for me and my

Life.


3  Who may ascend the mountain of the Lord?

    Who may stand in his holy place?


Thank you for the blood of Jesus that made a way for me to come to you. I don’t

deserve it, but I am so thankful. I come before you now, for it is only in your

Presence I find what I need.


4  The one who has clean hands and a pure heart,

    who does not trust in an idol

    or swear by a false god.”


Would you purify my hands and my heart once again? I repent for trusting the

Things of this world more than I trusted you. Show me your ways. In you alone I put my

trust. You alone are my God. Help me to always seek you first, above all the

noise of the world.


I love you, Lord. I pray this in the almighty name of Jesus Christ, amen.


59 views0 comments

Recent Posts

See All

Yorumlar


bottom of page